Just back from our annual cottage stay at Allenwood beach, near Wasaga. This year, we booked the cottage for 2 weeks. We’ve been going for 9 years now. It’s gotten to feel just like home.

Last year, we had such lovely weather and such a good time, that we decided to book for 2 weeks. We planned to invite many guests for the first week, and reserve the second week for our family. For many years, my brother’s family stayed with us. This year, he came up only for the weekend, but left the kids with us for the second week. As an added bonus, good friends Joanne, Gord and their son Nick booked the neighbouring cottage for the first week. So there was no end of fun this year! My kids had a blast!

Highlights for me:

Bronwyn yelling at a child who tore apart her lovely sand crab — Bronwyn is so soft spoken, her yelling sounded like mild scolding to me, but she felt so bad afterwards!

Making movies using the digital camera with Jim and Laurie’s kids.

A long walk on the beach with Debbie.

Jeff’s toy airplanes.

Playing balderdash with Roy, Gordon Iain, Joanne, Gord and Nick. Listening to Gord’s guffaws at Ronnie’s word definitions, which usually involved bodily functions. Unfortunately, we could always tell which ones Ronnie wrote, so he didn’t get many votes. He did enjoy making us laugh, though. Examples:
Zygal: Diarrhea
Asafetida: Eyeball and blood sandwich
Clamjamfry: A giant’s fart
Also really enjoyed watching Roy lose it (tears down the face and all) after Michael’s definition for Gallimaufry (pronounced gal-im-off-free): “The gazelle mating ritual”. Especially after someone said “Get-‘im-off-me!”.

Watching the movie “Dude, where’s my car?” with Lisa and Eric. Definitely a movie only kids would enjoy, but memorable for me for 2 reasons. First, one of the 2 main characters looked so much like a young Reid (starring one of the guys from “That 70’s show”). I pointed out each feature that they had in common, which Reid enjoyed SO much. Second, there is a fantastic sequence where the Reid look-alike goes through a Chinese fast-food drive through. It involves a heavily-accented Chinese woman’s voice coming through the speaker, saying “And then?” after each item ordered, but refusing to stop saying “And then?” even after the order is complete. It goes on for quite a while, until he rips apart the speaker. It’s very funny and Michael and Ronnie are very good at imitating the voice now.

Incredible, amazing, fantastic sunsets.>

Leaving my kids alone in the cottage one night, with Lisa and Eric in charge, so that Reid and I could lie on a blanket on the beach and look at the stars. It’s so rare that I get to see a night sky that’s not awash in city lights!

Best day at the beach: Rita and Barbara happened to be visiting. Very warm day, bright and sunny, lots of wind, water was bathtub warm and huge waves!! Lots of body surfing. Great fun (except that Lisa, who like me rarely burns, got burned that day).

All in all, a wonderful vacation. Reid took lots of pictures. You can see them here.

Keeper for the Day!

Last Saturday I participated in the Keeper for the Day program at the zoo. I had the privilege of helping to look after the elephants and seals. What a wonderful experience!

I met Nicole, one of the keepers, at the zoo at 6:45am. She gave me official zoo coveralls to wear and brought me over to the elephant’s night lodgings. The zoo has 7 elephants, all female.

My first chore was to help cut up their “treats”, which consisted of carrots, apples, kale, onions!, and garlic! And yes, elephants get garlic breath if they give them too much garlic. Then Nicole and Vernon (another keeper) began the complicated procedure of moving elephants around from one pen to another so that they could maneuver one of the elephants, Ingira, to the proper pen for her manicure.

They manicure one elephant foot each day. The elephants are trained to place their foot through an opening in the pen. Then one keeper feeds the elephant treats during the manicure, which can take as long as half an hour. The nails are filed down with a huge metal file (much like the files one would use on wood), and the pads of their feet are peeled.

I missed watching the elephants being put out on display because Sarah (another of the keepers) brought me out to the Seal pen to help there. Sarah told me that one of their seals, Nelson, had suddenly died only a few days before. His lungs had been filled with some sort of infection. It was very sad.

We prepared and doled out breakfast for the seals. The females got squid, which had capsules tucked into them. Timo, the male, got herring. The capsules consisted of vitamins and minerals and salt. The salt is necessary in order to replace the salt they would be getting while feeding in the salt seas in the wild. After showing me how to read their menu chart, Sarah entrusted me to prepare their lunch. They got herring and capelin. The herring had to be cut into chunks. Winnie, one of the females, seems to be picky — she doesn’t like heads. So I gave her herring heads to Timo. Their lunch was left in the fridge in buckets, ready to be given during the “Meet the Keeper” talk at 12:30.

Sarah and I returned to the elephant pens just in time to start cleaning them out. This chore takes quite a while, as you can imagine. Elephant poo looks much like wet hey. Did you know, they only digest 40% of what they eat!! Perhaps it was for this reason that I didn’t find the smell to be as bad as I expected. I was very happy to have the coveralls, as I got quite messy.

We used big squeegees on poles to make piles of elephant dung, then used shovels and wheelbarrows to haul it all out. Then the pens got hosed down. The walls got hosed down, too — elephants like to throw their dung around! I helped to clear the drains as they would get clogged up with the undigested hay, and got splashed in the face as a reward!

I was exhausted part way through the day. We only had one short break in the morning and a very short afternoon lunch break. The lunch break was cut short because Nicole asked if I wanted to see a hippo up close. “Yes!!”

So she brought me to Samson, who was off display for the morning. She picked up a honeydew melon on the way. He was in the pool section of his pen. Nicole called to him, like one would call to a baby… “Sammy!!! Come ‘ere!!! Come on, boy… ” She says he’s a real sweetie. Hard to imagine a hippo as a sweetie!!

When he finally dragged himself out of the pool and lumbered over, he opened his mouth very wide for us and we rubbed the inside of his mouth. She gave him the melon, whole, and he crunched away at it. You know, he really was a sweetie!!

The day ended at 3pm and I came home smelling of elephant. All in all it was a tiring, but amazing experience.


So… I have ulcerative colitis (UC). It’s an Inflamatory Bowel Disease (IBD). People don’t often talk about IBDs because it’s not polite to discuss the symptoms in public. That’s unfortunate. I’d never even heard of ulcerative colitis, or any other type of IBD, before I was diagnosed. So here I am, discussing it in a very public place!!

I’ve had 3 flare ups since I was diagnosed about 3 or 4 years ago. No one knows what causes it and there’s no cure other than to cut out the offending piece of bowel. I’d rather not cut out important pieces of me, so I’ve been trying to get it under control in other ways. The current flare up started last August, almost a year ago now! My doctor and I had planned to get it under control in a few weeks. Hah!!

When the colitis is active, one tends to run to the bathroom often, in a ‘mad dash’ sort of way. We’re lucky to have 3 bathrooms in the house. The symptoms include quite painful cramping and loss of blood. It’s funny. I can deal with the pain (it only happens once in a while), but it’s the sight of blood where one is not supposed to see blood that bothers me the most. Hm. I thought I would be able to be more specific about the symptoms, but I can’t. I keep picturing people reading this and I get too embarrassed to provide details. I suppose these diseases will always be kept quiet for this reason!

Anyway, I’ve been on cortico-steroids since the flare up started. Steroids are not nice. Well, maybe they have some cool side effects, but mostly they’re nasty. The nice thing is that I have so much energy I don’t know what to do with myself. It’s probably why I’ve been working on my house, diligently and without pause, while the kids were in school. I’ve painted, wall papered, stripped baseboards, replaced lighting, re-wired phone lines, … the list is so long, it would take pages. So my sabbatical has actually been: Luisa working furiously to burn off all the energy she’s had due to the steroids. The other nice things about the steroids: gives you a healthy glow, stronger fingernails, and thicker hair. The bad thing about steroids: waking up at 4 or 5 am, easily bruised legs and arms, extra facial hair, more susceptible to sun burns, weaker bones, blurred vision, adrenal gland shuts down and your face shape changes (wider jowls). Funny, my doctor insists that the type of steroids I take do not have that many side effects. He can’t seem to believe me when I tell him what it’s like for me. I guess I’m just sensitive to them.

At present time, I’m coming off the steroids. (I’ve come off them 3 times before, but have had to go on them again since the symptoms would worsen.) I’m suffering from withdrawal. So as I type this, I have a headache. I’ve also been exhausted all day. One has to come off the steroids very slowly. At present, I take them only every third day. So about 6 or 7 hours before I’m due for my “fix”, I get a headache. No amount of over-the-counter pain killers will make my withdrawal headaches go away.

I’ve recently started taking another drug that my doctor tells me his patients prefer to the steroids. It’s an autoimmune suppressing drug. I looked up the side effects: carcinogenic, mutogenic, blah, blah… “Hey Reid, this drug turns me into a mutant!! I’m gonna sprout a 3rd eye!” I was upset at first, but then I realized that practically everything out there is carcinogenic these days. The drug’s been in use since the 50’s so I’m not going to worry about it. We’ve tried everything else – it’s time to try this. (Yes, I’ve done the naturopath thing. It made me worse!)

It’s funny, though. Although it’s a difficult disease to deal with, I’ve never missed a day of work because of it (other than for doctor appointments). Yes, this disease has affected my life greatly. There are things I can no longer do. But you know, I’m very thankful it’s not something worse. It’s also made me think about what’s most important to me: my family and time for myself.

And now you know why I took a year off work!

Ronnie Story

Conversation in the car with Ronnie, on the way home from school yesterday:

Ronnie: “I want a diarrhea.”
(Michael: Muffled giggling)

Mom: “Why would you want diarrhea????”
(Michael: Barely contained laughing)

Ronnie, injured: “I want a diarrhea!!! Like a book!!”

Mom: “OH… you mean a diary
(Michael: Loud guffaws)